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Letting Go Of the Green-Eyed Monster

By Tom Seest

Can You Overcome Jealousy In Relationships?

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Jealousy can be an unpleasant emotion that threatens relationships and tears them apart if left unchecked, but this doesn’t have to be the case. Here’s what can help:
Understanding where jealous feelings stem from is the first step to managing them in a constructive manner and creating a more harmonious relationship dynamic.

Can You Overcome Jealousy In Relationships?

Can You Overcome Jealousy In Relationships?

Feeling overwhelmed by jealousy?

Jealousy is an understandable emotion and it can be addressed effectively in healthy ways. Recognizing what triggers your insecurities is key for creating stronger and more fulfilling partnerships; by addressing jealousy head on.
Jealousy can feel like an unseen force looming out from behind every corner, waiting to strike at any moment. In reality, however, jealousy is just an everyday emotion triggered by various circumstances: when our colleagues receive promotions at work, someone we care for flirts with another individual, we notice a physical change in one of our bodies, etc. It’s all part of life’s process, and sometimes it is difficult to separate our own insecurities from them all.
Shanenn interviews relationship expert Misha Wade for advice on handling jealousy in relationships. They discuss its normal occurrence but also its significance as a sign of potential disconnect within your partnership, so it’s crucial that jealousy be addressed immediately so you can move forward together.
Wade advises her listeners to become aware of their jealous feelings and physical sensations so they can gain a better understanding of why these emotions exist. She suggests creating a list of all of your insecurities driving jealousy, followed by devising solutions. For instance, if your partner’s former flame makes you jealous, try unfollowing them on social media for one week as a means of distancing yourself from feelings of inferiority and discomfort.
Alongside practicing self-care, it’s also crucial that partners find time for themselves, discussing any jealousy feelings they are experiencing. Though all relationships – monogamous or non-monogamy – experience challenging times and encounter ego checks from time to time, with support you can learn how to cope with jealousy in ways that strengthen both of your partnerships and ultimately makes both parties happier.

Feeling overwhelmed by jealousy?

Feeling overwhelmed by jealousy?

What Could You be Missing in the Situation?

Jealousy is an unpleasant emotion characterized by feelings of suspicion, distrust and resentment that is difficult to manage in relationships – particularly when it takes on unhealthy or potentially destructive forms. Be it envy for another’s achievements, possessions or perceived advantages; jealousy is a low vibration emotion that creates anxiety while simultaneously undermining trust between individuals.
But it doesn’t have to be this way – we can change how we feel by altering the thoughts that run through our heads – an effectual technique called reframing that can serve as an invaluable asset for relationships.
Reframing thoughts requires three steps: Catch it, Check it and Change it. Though initially challenging, with practice it becomes easier and more effective. By employing this “Catch it, Check it, Change it” process, you are exploring the reality of your situation while gathering evidence against unhelpful beliefs that arise before challenging unproductive ones with more constructive alternatives that might provide relief and shift perspective. Although not guaranteed success may result, breaking negative spirals and shifting perspectives is one way of finding hope and change.
Example: Say to yourself: “I understand that my partner has been hurt by others in the past and is sensitive towards them; however, they decide how they interact with other people based on that pain.”
Reframing can help by offering another perspective to any given situation. If you find yourself feeling jealous over something your partner did in the past, taking a step back can give a different outlook on it and help strengthen relationships in positive ways.

What Could You be Missing in the Situation?

What Could You be Missing in the Situation?

How Can You Overcome Relationship Jealousy?

Rather than allow envy to fester inside of you and cause anxiety, the best thing to do is talk it over with someone. Jealousy can be an intense feeling that can tear relationships apart if left unaddressed; so taking some time for yourself may help, as well as having open and honest discussions with friends or family members about how you’re feeling.
Misla and Hamilton agree that jealousy can be a natural response to feelings of insecurity, scarcity or fear that stem back to past experiences. Jealousy often arises after some form of loss has been experienced – whether physical or otherwise – with many finding comfort in feeling excluded and less valued by partners. At times it’s also used as a defense mechanism against further hurt by our partners.
If we want to be healthy and content, we must learn to handle jealousy in an appropriate and productive way. Jealousy may not be easy or straightforward, but with practice we can master this difficult emotion to create more fulfilling relationships.
In this episode, James Preece talks with Shanenn Bryant, a corporate trainer and life coach who helps clients regain confidence, build self-worth, and overcome extreme jealousy. Shanenn grew up as the adult child of an alcoholic and understands first-hand the struggles associated with low self-worth and confidence issues. She shares how jealousy was used as an excuse for bad behavior during her childhood years but now finds ways to deal with her feelings more constructively and healthily.

How Can You Overcome Relationship Jealousy?

How Can You Overcome Relationship Jealousy?

What Activities Bring You Joy?

Jealousy can be an uncomfortable emotion to deal with at times, yet it’s vital that it be addressed as soon as it arises. Jealousy refers to feelings of envy or suspicion toward another individual’s achievements, possessions, and perceived advantages compared to oneself; its results can range from mild irritation through feelings of distrust and low self-esteem – James talks to Shanenn Bryant of Life Coach to get her insight on this complex emotion.
Shanenn explains that jealousy is a biological response caused by hormones and cells within our bodies, specifically within the limbic system. These hormones search for receptors to bond with, which then release chemicals causing hurt, fear and worry to surface as lower vibration emotions. Therefore it’s crucial that one gets themselves back into a positive space by acknowledging all their loved ones have achieved in life and feeling grateful towards them for doing so.
Jealousy can also serve as a useful indicator of what’s lacking in your relationships, indicating when something may not meet your expectations or an ongoing pattern may exist. For instance, never feeling jealous could indicate your partner is not meeting those needs or that this behavior has become part of who you are as an individual over time. If this has happened many times over, then this might indicate something about who you are as an individual – perhaps an indicator that this jealousy pattern has followed you throughout life.
Misla and Hamilton both agree that jealousy may be harmful, but in small doses, it is usually not all that harmful to relationships. Indeed, jealousy may help identify missing components in a relationship so changes can be made accordingly. It becomes a problem when jealousy is caused by external friction or internal feelings of insecurity and scarcity triggered by past experiences; such issues may prove challenging to overcome even in non-monogamy relationships like those enjoyed by Jules Purnell or Joli Hamilton.

What Activities Bring You Joy?

What Activities Bring You Joy?

Why Should You Practice Gratitude?

Jealousy can be an unpleasant emotion that leads to feelings of resentment, suspicion and distrust in relationships. Feeling jealous occasionally is perfectly acceptable; however, when these emotions turn into obsessions or unreasonable fears that cause doubt about your partner and lead you to act uncharacteristically or act out unexpectedly it becomes unhealthy and potentially detrimental.
At the core of jealousy lies its source: yourself. By asking “why am I thinking this way”, it may become possible to identify which thoughts may be fueling jealousy and replace them with more positive and empowering thoughts.
Once you’ve recognized your root thought, the next step should be practicing gratitude. When witnessing another’s successes or fortunes, rather than feeling jealousy for what they may be experiencing, remember that life is fair – they may be reaping what they desire while you receive something of value in return.
Divest from jealousy – whether in past relationships or even as a child – by practicing gratitude, and channeling this energy towards creating the life you want and becoming your best self. Schedule a 30-minute Discovery Session with Cheryl Jones today to help break free.

Why Should You Practice Gratitude?

Why Should You Practice Gratitude?

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